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Neil Kellen's avatar

An important inference from your column: those of us who are now "conservatives" seem to place more value on relationships than do "liberals". I have seen this over and over and over again. Most of my siblings are liberal, and they easily jettisoned our relationship when I wouldn't prostrate myself to their ideologies. Todays' liberals are a very angry bunch.

I hope your daughter, as she matures, allows you some of the grace you are allowing her.

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Acastus's avatar

An astute observation based on a close read.

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JJoshua's avatar

Liberals are the true party of hate and non-inclusion

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

https://www.axios.com/2021/12/08/poll-political-polarization-students

The above poll from 2021 supports the above statements!

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Chris's avatar

Same here...though I’ve tried to leave a bridge or two intact just in case ...but no longer feel obligated to follow them down the rabbit hole by way of wack-a-mole arguing over Kafka traps.

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Mike Stevens's avatar

A message to all who are struggling with selfhood. I care about your character, not your colour, I care about your reason, not your race, I care about your genius, not your gender, I care about your ethics, not your equity. Character, not characteristics define a human being, and today our character has become a collage of the collective, of labels, of identities, of postures, of approvals. It is so very hard in life to discover and nurture your 'self', to try, test and trust a set of values by which you can productively interact with others, to be alive and thrive. But when you outsource that process, when you let others define you, especially your gender, in trade for acceptance, for membership in the 'clan', you slip from Self to Serf. You are owned by an identity, not your individuality. And history is replete with examples of serfdom in all its torturous and inhuman forms. And every human being throughout history has gone through the torturous journey of determining who we are and how we will act. Think for your self, do not let others define you, BUT do not think that you can force me to accept your "identity" or gender as some sort of proxy for character. Your freedom of expression is not a license to oppress others or to cancel and harm others such that you become the oppressor, not the oppressed. Freedom to express also implies freedom to reject. Oppression is what you let happen, Opportunity is what you make happen, and character, not characteristics define a human being.

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Libertarian's avatar

Well said. You should write more often.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

Fantastic. Well stated. One of the biggest general problems that we have as a society is that we are expected, now, to define ourselves in very narrow boxes of “identity”. It’s garbage. I teach my kids: some boys like to play with dolls. Some girls like monster trucks and dump trucks. Funny enough both my daughter and my son like all of these things. My son loves pink. My daughter loves dresses. Literally none of this matters. We are light skinned. Some people have darker or lighter skin than us. Literally doesn’t matter.

Why should liking pink make my son a girl? It doesn’t. That’s non-sensical. Why should having darker skin make someone “black” or “African American”. It shouldn’t. They just have relatively more melanin in their skin than i do. We don’t need a separate term for darker-soone skinned people once they pass a certain threshold of melanin.

Some people define themselves almost exclusively as “gay”. Really? The most important thing about you that you want to tell everyone about and be known for... is who you want to have sex with? It’s absurd. We are complex beings and should not dumb down who we are by applying labels to ourselves. It only serves to divide.

I am a firm believer that every single person’s most important identity is as a child of God. We should never let anything else supplant that truth, that we are divine. Everything else is a distraction.

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Esther's avatar

Good lord that was brilliant

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Neil Baxter's avatar

Well said, Mike. Ithink you have a lot more opinions that I'd like to hear.

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William Conner's avatar

I agree with the one of the videos you showed, when Kellie-Jay says it's like a gateway drug. Under the oft-used guise of being inclusive, when we accept the pronoun game we are telling our children, truth doesn't matter. The best thing in life is that people like us, regardless of the terms.

We have to make a stand somewhere, we've been choosing 'not to die on enough hills' for too long! And what do we have, half the nation along with almost all our institutions in complete denial of the truth in front of us. The biggest of these truths being that our collective mental health, especially of our young, is hanging by a thread.

Just look at all age group suicide rates, look at all the mass shootings, look how we are supposed to believe that all of the sudden every fourth child wants to be the opposite sex (something never seen anywhere in history), look at how many just blindly accepted that natural immunity doesn't mean anything anymore, that masking children was a good thing, that an unproven vaccine as one size fits all makes sense. All of these things points to giant mental health problems.

So, let's die on this hill, let's be clear that you don't own the English language and by the way, pronouns are most often used when you are not around, I thought you were against anything resembling tyranny?!?, But most of all truth matters. Children need to understand, truth matters, even if it hurts feelings.

Good article as always Sasha.

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Ruth H's avatar

Well said and totally agree. IMO I think it’s more important for our children to know and understand that as their parent, I will always be truthful with them. They also know I won’t always agree with them, but will honor their interpretation or decision. I could never ‘go along’ out of fear of our relationship. My love for them goes beyond ‘going along.’ Pronouns are used when the person is not present, so if someone thought I needed to know their pronouns I would be puzzled to think why it’s important. We as adults, parents, and grandparents need to take a stand. Stand for truth, do not succumb to ‘political correctness’ of any form, which is the beginning of tyranny.

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SpandX's avatar

What of those adults with children that will do anything necessary not to be considered bad parents? The judge in this case is either their own children or their own warped understanding of what this new social media driven society expects them to do.

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Libertarian's avatar

To me when to use preferred pronouns is like the difference between “bullshit” and “lies”; the former is false but highly unlikely to harm anyone; the latter is false and is either intended to harm or is negligent about harm. In my view, using preferred pronouns with adults is not likely to harm but using opposite to their sex with kids is at best negligent about the harm it could have on them.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

I strongly agree with the distinction you are making here. I believe that adults should always guide children towards recognition and acceptance of reality, even while supporting children's natural immersion in fantasy.

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Libertarian's avatar

Thanks Sandra. And btw it’s not about the quantity of the “likes”, it’s about the quality of them. And I value yours.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

Thank you! I reciprocate that valuation.

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judith's avatar

Yes and as is the entire child abuse/molestation

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

The words "male" and "female" are biological terms that apply to all species in which there are two sexes. No one can transition from male to female or vice versa, and I do not refer to trans women as "female" or trans men as "male."

People can obviously choose to live as the other sex if they want to do so. Most of them do want to look like the preferred sex to the point that other people can't discern their true sex. More recently, many have gone farther by changing the biological sex recorded on their birth certificates. For trans people, the reason why puberty is such a big issue is that it makes their true sex progressively and irreversibly more obvious.

The words "man" and "woman" are synonyms for biological sex in human beings. If we change the meaning of these terms to include people who are pretending to be other than the sex they are, we are making a massive accommodation to a tiny fraction of the population. This accommodation is not new, however, as many (but not all) people in many (but not all) cultures have to varying degrees tolerated trans people identifying themselves publicly as the opposite sex.

Unfortunately, "trans activists," most of whom are males and many of whom behave like narcissists, are insisting that everyone call them "women" when they are not living as women and have not changed their bodies. They abuse biological females living as women as well as opening the door for other narcissistic and sociopathic males to do likewise. These activists are destroying the good will that an increasing number of Americans were extending to trans people in general.

I have no problem at all using preferred pronouns when referring to people who have transitioned and want to be accepted by others in our culture. This is a two way street, however. Trans people have to accommodate to us as well, and make a good faith effort to be constructive and ethical towards people who are normally gendered. I refuse to use preferred pronouns in reference to people like Lia Thomas, rapists, etc., who are trampling on women's and children's rights. I would note that the overwhelming majority of these abusive individuals are males, and they are behaving as abusive males towards biological females, whom they apparently hate. The element of envious rage is an obvious motivator here.

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Libertarian's avatar

Really well written and thoughtful, Sandra. You highlighted some aspects that were vague to me before (eg not using preferred pronouns for those that are abusing the trend and hurting women).

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

Thank you!

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Esther's avatar

Your last paragraph in particular really resonated.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

Why can’t you just tell the truth? Why is that so hard? Even if someone doesn’t want you to. You can take the polite road and just refuse to use ANY pronouns, and use their name, keeping your dignity intact. Why would you ever need to indulge the delusion?

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Apr 15, 2023
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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

Much more well thought out than the person you’re replying my to.

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Beth's avatar

I respectfully and whole heartedly disagree with you. You are denying God and not respecting Him when you use a pronoun that affirms a gender God did not give them. You are aiding their delusion and helping them walk down the path to perdition. You say the most important thing in your life is to get along with your daughter. While that is important the most important relationship is the one you have with God.

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BeadleBlog's avatar

I would say one's relationship with one's children, and the God given parental instinct to protect them, is a fundamental part of a relationship with God.

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Beth's avatar

How is placating your child’s delusion and affirming the belief that someone can ignore God’s plan by being whatever sex a person “prefers” Godly?

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BeadleBlog's avatar

Since moving to another planet isn't an option, and her daughter (like many young people) is surrounded by this stuff and has to deal with it up in her face, she's expertly walking a fine line in order to protect her daughter. Her daughter knows what mom thinks but doesn't need to be constantly reminded, especially since she can't get away from it and has to deal with her peers and the older adults leading this lunacy. I didn't read anything in the column that indicated she was "affirming" anything. I thank God every day that I had wonderful grandparents that remained supportive throughout some of my really stupid teen and young adult years. I still knew what they believed and how they didn't approve of everything I did, but they were still always there for me. Sasha's description of her interaction with her daughter reminds me of those days.

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Beth's avatar

Fair point. I don’t agree with it as I think you can in a gentle and loving way explain to your child why you won’t capitulate to the transgender ideology without alienating them (as I have done with my own children). It’s a parent’s job to teach that truth is truth even when it’s inconvenient. But I see your point.

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BeadleBlog's avatar

Thank you. I also see your point and I believe there's a way to "not capitulate" without making everything a battle. She described arguing with her daughter and then later says "People of her generation are, on their own, starting to realize the dangers of these medicines." I would say her approach is working.

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BeadleBlog's avatar

I may be wrong, but this is what I hear reading her words.

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judith's avatar

Too bad for we who think as you do. They are turning half the population away from God as we speak and relegating religion to the dinosaur heap. Marx at his best

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Double Mc's avatar

Have you read the book, When People Are Big and God is Small? A most enlightening read.

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Libertarian's avatar

Pretty sure that you asserting what Sasha’s most important relationship should be is not an effective or efficient approach on your part.

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Sasha Stone's avatar

I came up with a compromise - I added him/her or he/she to the piece about Thomas. That seems the best way to indicate one is speaking of a "trans-identified" person.

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Carol Carney's avatar

I totally can identify with your struggle when dealing with your daughter. I am in a similar situation and am often torn between wanting to sit with her to try to point out the frightening issues of this whole transgender trend and realizing that we are confronting a much bigger beast of ideology and indoctrination. I appreciate your thoughts on this situation

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Libertarian's avatar

As a guy who has always adored the female form, I just don’t get why any sensible woman would want to trade that gift for a guy’s gangly scratchy body. And tell her it doesn’t get better with age.

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judith's avatar

https://www.marxist.com/images/stories/theory/MarxWasRightLatuff.jpg. See if she will read das Kapital. Ps Marx died about 200 years ago so we’re a bit slow

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Glenn K Beaton's avatar

"In my last piece I referred to Audrey Hale as a “he” but Lia Thomas as a “she.” .... I would never, could never in good conscious call her a “he.”"

I'm confused. Is there a typo in this paragraph? You start by saying you referred to Audrey as a he, and conclude in saying you could never call Audrey a he.

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Double Mc's avatar

I assumed it was a typo, after rereading it several times.

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Bat Man's avatar

I didn't get it either.

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jemarr's avatar

Such is the confusion caused by the “re-defining” of previously unambiguous terms. I resent the time I have to spend figuring out whether a story is about a boy or a girl. Sorry to be petty....

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NotFromTexas's avatar

"However, I choose to use preferred pronouns in certain situations to protect people I care about and to keep the communication line open with people outside the echo chamber of the Right. It is, to me, a compromise."

...and is entirely your prerogative.

Such is an option everyone ought to be able to exercise without adverse consequence, one way or the other.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

Well, when someone goes along with the delusion... there will be adverse consequences. Like it or not, the truth is the truth and denying it is not on anyone’s best interest, literally ever.

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NotFromTexas's avatar

No argument, here - what ought to be vs what IS, is the difference between night and day.

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Jeff Keener's avatar

My currently preferred pronouns are "Hee!" and "Haw!". Only because I want to hear those who worry about such things bray "Hee!" and "Haw!".

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Libertarian's avatar

I will use your pronouns and indeed they remind me of the noise attributed to jackasses:D.

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SpandX's avatar

Trendy mental illness is still mental illness.

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RE Nichols's avatar

This reminds me of the eating disorders that were prevalent among girls my age in the 80's. I never lost enough weight to endanger myself. But boy did I HATE my curvy, young body. Hot by today's standards. Back then I kept getting called "fatso," "porker," "lady de lardo," and "fat b*tch" by my peers. Older women told me, "If you'd only quit eating and get down to a size five some guy might love you. No man ever fell in love with a fatty. You'll never get married unless you lose a lot of weight. You can never be too thin or too rich."

But no doctors urged normal weight girls to get liposuction or gastric bypass. If they had gotten their act together with commercials, propaganda campaigns, etc. I bet they could really have cashed in. Which is all doctors care about.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

It appears to me (as a professional psychologist) that the burgeoning number of adolescent girls claiming to be trans (or gay) come from the same demographics as the initial cases of eating disorders in the 1980's. The latter were typically white girls and young women from upper socioeconomic classes. The eating disorder craze was spread by social contagion, such that groups of college students would gather in the women's restrooms to vomit together and share other destructive technologies for weight reduction. A percentage of these young women had/have significant psychiatric problems, especially personality disorders, and based on what I have seen so far, the pseudo-trans pseudo-gay group may be similar to the young women with persistent eating disorders.

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judith's avatar

Sadly psych education seems to be moving away from traditional and researched treatment protocols. Seems as if one thing goes mad things all tumble down with it.

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RE Nichols's avatar

I found 25 years of standard psychiatry the reverse of helpful. Long story. Too long for a comment in a forum.

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Libertarian's avatar

Good grief. And here I thought we boys were by far the biggest idiots.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

There is a lot to be said for maturation in both sexes! All the more reason to doubt the judgment of people under 25. Nowadays, it's looking more like under 45.

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RE Nichols's avatar

The insults by boys stung the worst. But the bulk of them came from other girls or older women I looked up to. (No pun intended.)

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Libertarian's avatar

Women are their own worst enemy.

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Jonah's avatar

I made the joke that if I had to pick a pronoun, I would pick "you."

This might be fun when they talk about me when I'm not present.

"Did you see Jonah? I told you to be more prompt with the TPS reports."

"What? I don't write the TPS reports."

"Not you. Jonah. I told you to be prompt with the TPS reports."

"No you didn't."

But more seriously....

I have to side with Jordan Peterson that this is ultimately a very diabolical method of speech control. Worse, contributing to the delusion.

I've seen more young people transitioning. This distresses me. I was a transvestite for many years. I weighed transitioning, but decided I valued my good health too much to play dice with my body. So I just opted for the costume, and I am grateful today for that decision.

I have yet to have someone actually close to me go down this rabbit hole. I hope I'm up to that challenge when it comes.

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Libertarian's avatar

Well done, Jonah. And thanks for sharing your story because I value the views of the people closest to the topic.

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Jonah's avatar

I thought I was close to the topic. But I think I'm actually very far away from this new.... this new world.

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Steve C's avatar

Excerpt from The Emperor's New Clothes:

So off went the Emperor in procession under his splendid canopy. Everyone in the streets and the windows said, "Oh, how fine are the Emperor's new clothes! Don't they fit him to perfection? And see his long train!" Nobody would confess that he couldn't see anything, for that would prove him either unfit for his position, or a fool. No costume the Emperor had worn before was ever such a complete success.

"But he hasn't got anything on," a little child said.

"Did you ever hear such innocent prattle?" said its father. And one person whispered to another what the child had said, "He hasn't anything on. A child says he hasn't anything on."

"But he hasn't got anything on!" the whole town cried out at last.

The Emperor shivered, for he suspected they were right. But he thought, "This procession has got to go on." So he walked more proudly than ever, as his noblemen held high the train that wasn't there at all.

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Heyjude's avatar

Sasha, thanks for a thoughtful piece. More nuance than we hear from the activists.

I haven’t read widely on the topic of youth gender questioning and transition, but I believe that the recent increase is much higher among girls than boys. Yet almost all the media attention is on the men transitioning to women. Aside from Chaz Bono many years ago, name one famous female to male transitioner.

There seems to be a disconnect between what is publicized and celebrated, and what is actually going on.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

True cases of females transitioning to men have historically been rare relative to the reverse situation. I also suspect that biologically driven sex differences are showing up in the physically aggressive behaviors being disproportionately displayed by male activists: i.e., physical dominance in women's sports, physical intimidation of women and obviously, rape.

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Matt L.'s avatar

Ellen to Elliot Page comes to mind as a famous actor who transitioned from female to male. Jordan Peterson was banned from Twitter at the time for deadnaming and stating the physician was criminal for doing that surgery.

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John shepherd's avatar

I worry about all new converts. Trumpets are as mentally clouded as the leftist aocs. I lean republican cause they say they'll are fiscally better then the other side. In reality it's a uniparty that is only about increasing the size of the levitation. Just look at the lack of fight to fix social security and Medicare. Also follow military spending when on side is in. Only ever goes up. Eisenhower was correct all those years ago. My advice is watch movies, love your daughter, travel and keep up your growth on not needing a side. U have tons of talent. Would love if u called reason magazine or Cato. Maybe a collaboration would be fruitful to u. I give to both. True libertarians really need voices like yours, Joe Rogan, Jordan Peterson etc. Without u we are impotent. Keep charging forward. I live your work. Thnx.

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Michelle Vianello's avatar

Spot on Sasha! (And I

am a “Trump supporting bigot.” )

I believe everyone has a right to be happy. And using the “proper pronouns” is a hill I don’t want to die on. To each their own. But at the same time, I will not be forced to speak their speak if I don’t want to. They don’t own the language.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

As a medical provider and the father of a daughter and a son (and another on the way), absolutely a hill i would die on. Boys are boys, referred to by specific masculine pronouns and women are women, with feminine pronouns. Denying this absolutely will have more negative far reaching consequences, individually and as a society, than we can possibly imagine.

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swade's avatar

Sadly, you're being emotionally blackmailed with the "correct" pronoun fiction. While you may care about maintaining a relationship with these 'friends', they will cut you off the second you fail to comply with their ideology. Is it really worth trying to hang on to people and relationships like that? I've stopped reading certain news outlets because of their pronoun policies. It's a biological impossibility for a person to 'transition' into the other sex. If they can lie about that, what else are they lying about?

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Libertarian's avatar

I get your argument but I think it’s important to continue to listen to opposing views because sometimes they morph in to more sensible positions. Ditto for people; witness Sasha’s transformation from woke to objective.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

“Listen to” is not the same as “affirm”. I can listen to anyone’s point of view, but i will not affirm something that i know is not true.

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judith's avatar

To Sasha Stone Well said. Some people fight battles with guns and some follow along with food and wound care.

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BeadleBlog's avatar

Each one of us has a role to play in where this goes, if we so choose. Our children are grown, but if I had a child trying to work through this, I would do as you're doing to protect your daughter. But we need all of us and some of us need to set a very clear boundary (be the vinegar) so we don't lose ourselves in a lie. I've been around a few trannies and in personal conversation I would use "she" and that was my personal choice, but if somebody got nasty and insisted I say certain words as happens today, that would have ended interaction. If I'm in public and if children are around, I'm going to use the correct sex pronoun. Kids have already been confused and damaged enough by older generations and their fetishes. Then there's conversation that is contrary to science. Drugs may alter an appearance to make someone look more like the opposite sex, but the person will not "become" the opposite sex. Since your column is for adults it doesn't really matter (in my opinion) how you use the language, as long as I understand what you're saying. We're all fighting for a decent future for our children. Keep up the great work!

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Mac's avatar

Sasha I believe we've walked right into a Dr. Suess book "Me Can't Be A He" and I can't wait for the last page.

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Libertarian's avatar

“Would you like to be a she or or would you like to be a he? It does not matter Sam I Am because I am always just my own me.”

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Tim Gregory's avatar

What is happening in the culture is ideological warfare and whoever controls the language wins the day. Pronoun misuse, whether by yourself or others is a sort of semantic pollution. If enough of this pollution is inhaled, otherwise intellegent people will begin to accept it. We need fresh air and need to call out those who are subverting the language.

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JT's avatar

I thought your April 14th column was another great one…and I wanted to comment on how I thought your analogy regarding the treatment of Audrey Hale as a female victim rather than a white male perp (when that was her chosen identity) was spot on! It didn’t fit the narrative, it was inconvenient, and therefore, for purposes of their discussion of the event, the angry white “he” reverted to a victimized “she.” I also wanted to respectfully question your usage of pronouns in the column...and apparently I wasn’t the only one as your column today is addressing that very issue.

As for today’s column, the part that stood out to me was your concern that calling Lia Thomas a “he” would stop the conversation and you would be tabled a “far right bigot.” Sasha, isn’t that the gun they’re holding to all of our heads? If we don’t comply with this or that "dictate du jour,” then we become persona non grata and are cancelled! They refuse to discuss the issue, they take their ball and go home all the while calling us names, or...they become violent as they did with Riley Gaines. And here’s the thing, they’ll keep doing it as long as we allow them to do it. Don’t we owe our support to Riley Gaines and the others with her courage…shouldn’t we stand up to this mob along side Riley and the others rather than worrying about what names they might call us?

It is not disrespectful to be truthful…we can’t allow them to manipulate us that way. In the end, isn’t it a matter of choosing personal integrity over convenience?

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embarrassingly parallel's avatar

JT, I first had that gun held to my head ten years ago, and have since fought plenty. It started with unexpected accusations of "Fascist!" even though the topic of discussion rarely connected with such a label, let alone validating it. And... it became worse, as academia, mainstream DC, and mainstream media signed up as disciples.

I started to fear a reaction from heretics that would be worse than 1/6. An ugly example would be that if you call some group racists too often, then some number may just become racists.

But, most of us are not yet of a hive-mind, so we're doing better than that. Joe Rogan recently argued the same, explaining that he understood why many bought into Ivermectin being horse-dewormer, just because they were innocent victims of propaganda. I agree with his strategy and hope we can diffuse the mob, rather than confronting them.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

"regarding the treatment of Audrey Hale as a female victim rather than a white male perp (when that was her chosen identity)"

Audrey's biological sex is of interest because the mass murder/suicide-by-cop cases in the U.S. have overwhelmingly involved mentally ill young males. Beyond that, most mass murders not involving suicide are committed by young males, primarily gang-affiliated. I wonder if Audrey was using testosterone, which could have increased her tendency towards aggression.

On the other hand, we do see a lot of mass murder/suicide incidents committed by female suicide bombers in the Middle East. Those cases appear to involve mass indoctrination and a religious idealization of martyrdom.

In both cases, some cultural influences appear to be overriding a sex-linked inhibition against killing.

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JT's avatar

I agree Sandra. I think Sasha's point was simply that as much as the trans/media/left communities insist that a transitioned individual is, in every sense, the person to which they have transitioned, the reality (as you correctly point out) is that they still are not biologically the person they insist we believe they are. In this case, however, the trans/media/left communities have taken it a step further in conferring victim-hood status on Ashley...and that fact tells us so much more about them than it does about Ashley.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

Your comment helps clarify for me what probably is Sasha's point.

My interest in the Audrey Hale shooting actually involves a different but related point, which is that in this case, Hale did behave more like a biological male than a female. It is in fact so rare for a woman to carry out a mass murder against strangers that the case begs for an explanation (for me as a psychologist, perhaps not for many others).

I am in the process of reviewing some of the recent "peer reviewed journal" articles on gender affirmative care of children. Most of this "research" is performed by people who work for gender clinics, and is both corrupt and incompetently executed. In one of them (I lost track of the citation and will need to recover it), the researchers wanted to compare trans-identified children with groups of normally gendered children on levels of psychological symptoms such as anxiety and depression. I was amused to read that they chose to compare the self-identified trans boys with normal boys and the self-identified trans girls with normal girls. They believed so strongly that trans boys are "actually boys" that they thought this was the proper match! Imagine their surprise when they found out that the trans boys scored more similarly to girls (their match in bio sex)! Many mental health problems are in fact linked to biological sex, e.g., depression is more commonly reported by females than males, so the diagnostic instruments accurately reflected the true sex of the trans boys (they had girl-type issues).

This is not true of Audrey Hale, however. She behaved like a young male mass murderer. Unfortunately, we may not learn much from this aberration, because of the suppression of the facts and the spin that you referenced in your comment.

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Sasha Stone's avatar

What the trans community wants you to believe is that she really WAS male and behaved that way but it's just as likely she wanted to BE male and wanted to be a male mass shooter.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

Yes, I agree with both points. When I reviewed what little has been said about her, (without knowing how much of that information is accurate), it appears that this person exhibited significant psychiatric symptoms for years. If she identified with the psychiatric profile of male mass murderers, the desire to be male was perhaps all it took to precipitate the action.

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CCLakeMich's avatar

Sasha, you made an important connection when you described your daughter’s experience with a Critical Race Theory class and your later theory that her friends have pivoted toward the trans experience so as not to be one of the “Oppressors”. I think they may be deeply related. Is is possible that the CRT “struggle sessions” happening all over the country in our public schools are driving kids to find a place to be shielded in some way from being shunned as oppressors? Maybe this is obvious and I’m just slow on the uptake, but I hadn’t connected those dots before. It would explain a lot of the appeal of “victimhood” and extreme activism that seems to be prevalent in high school/college level kids. Sounds like a really interesting area of inquiry.

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Sandra Pinches's avatar

The woke cult does think pretty much exclusively in binary terms, (which is completely inconsistent with their contention that biological sex is non-binary). It is definitely more moral in their ideology to be one of the victims. Being any kind of victim, including someone suffering from an illness, enhances one's status, especially among Gen Z people. In addition to gender dysphoria, a number of medical disorders are currently regarded as very cool by young people. I have read that there are sites on TikTok where performers mimic symptoms of certain illnesses, such as the tics typical of Tourette's Syndrome, so that young people can learn to imitate these behaviors.

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Tom Hansen's avatar

Good points. We all have to choose where we want to draw the line. My point was informed by my thesis advisor at UBC when I was writing my first book. He is a journalist in Canada and a big Orwell guy, a serious stickler for the accuracy of words, the accuracy of their meanings, and how without that we would be lost when it comes time to decide what is true and what is reality. That's important to me. And it's important for free speech too imo

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John shepherd's avatar

Sasha your fine. Never worry about being a libertarian. It's hard cause everyone hates u, but u get used to it. Using logic and common sense will only get u in trouble on both sides. Trust me. You are going in right direction for someone who loves art. Freedom is key. Your thoughts are yours and F. the man. As a punk skate loving guy from 80s California keep fighting the good fight. People are listening.

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GabeReal's avatar

The fact that a large portion of your daughter’s friends are transitioning to the opposite sex should tell you something. This ideology is a disease that seems to be spreading fast. Not normal at all IMO. But I agree we need to tread lightly as these are young sensitive souls and we need to remain compassionate. Tricky situation for sure.

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Double Mc's avatar

This issue is meant to tear us apart, and it's doing an excellent job. I like Libertarian's view of "BS vs. lies", but also, as a Christian, refuse to deny the truth: there are two genders, period. I am praying that we come out of this madness sooner rather than later, but we need to be prepared for the collateral damage that will remain, which is a whole confused, demoralized, lost generation. God help the perpetrators of this destructive ideology. I would not wish what they are facing when they stand before God on anyone.

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dorothy P slater's avatar

I am of the man and women only persuasion, but as a pastor, I cannot - and will not - decide what is going to happen to anyone standing before God. In my thinking, God has had to put up with a lot of misery from everyone from Adam and Eve onward. Poor God got so disgusted, we even had a world-wide flood to wipe us all out and then God thought (and yes I am thinking for God here) oh what the heck, guess I will have to just forgive them all in the end - after all I DID create them.

I am not a biblical literalist in any sense of the world, but in my days of preaching, the only thing II\ was pretty sure of given my own experiences of God'[s grace over the years, was that I didn't have to fear standing before the Divine nor should anyone else.

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Libertarian's avatar

Lol I came to the opposite conclusion based on Catholic teachings (and particularly by the Sisters of Mercy) that a) Hell is eternal (ie permanent and never ending pain) and b) Earth is temporal and anyone can tough it out, so c) be smart enough to fear that God will condemn you to Hell. If I am wrong then I needlessly gave up a lot of fun; if I am correct then I avoid eternal pain. Kinda like the prisoners dilemma.

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dorothy P slater's avatar

I have many EX-catholic friends who wonder why the nuns they had in parochial school (I grew up in a VERY Italian Catholic town) would be called Sisters of Mercy - since accoding to them , they didn't exhibit such a thing. BUt I think the Church has changed andI the old expression "get the to a nunnery" no longer fits. Most nuns I know - and I have met a lot over the years - are out teaching nursing, writing - etc and are great. Plus I figure anything that enables you to "tough it out"will work just fine -sd . Plus, some of the Catholic kids in my town had a lot more fun than this Missouri Synod Lutheran girl.

Can'tdo the Hell thing though - for a lot of people permanent and never ending pain is right here and I think they deserve an eternity of harp playing or better yet dancing with Fred Astaire which is my plan.

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Libertarian's avatar

Awesome Dorothy<3. We like to exaggerate how tough the nuns were; the vast majority were wonderful and overwhelmed with their 50 kids in a classroom. I do like your view of afterlife and hope I get to see you dancing with Fred while I step out with Ginger Rogers.

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NotFromTexas's avatar

I pray the same, but have to allow for the fact the answer may be, no.

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An independent observer's avatar

In my office, the administration released a training video on how to treat transgender people. It is mandatory to watch as a condition of continuous employment. In the video, am employee Patricia becomes Patrick and demands that everyone starts using new pronouns immediately. When the manager - a white old male, of course, - and other older employees say that they need some time to adjust as this is new to them, Patrick gets angry, but then receives a recommendation from a co-worker to file a complaint. He calls or writes to the EEO office, and the manager is punished for discrimination and creating a hostile work environment. Patrick is praised as a hero. The moral of the story is you better get on board quickly or else.

Maybe politeness and compromises should not be employed by the other side either. As someone wrote here, it is a war. It is a war on reality. Just imagine for a second what would happen if we are defeated. Though I just noticed I have mixed up the pronouns in my story too lol.

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Dvvy's avatar

“ If I called Lia Thomas a “he” that makes most people on the Right feel better because that is what they believe. But it immediately stops the conversation anywhere else. You are labeled a “far right bigot” and that’s the end of the it. “

I don’t know if this is true.

It’s certainly true about the left, but I suspect there’s a big ambivalent middle that is keeping quiet because they think it’s true.

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Libertarian's avatar

Lia Thomas’s teammates and opponents were silent because they didn’t want their career opportunities ruined or their status as a victim (rich Ivy League female lol) put at risk.

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judith's avatar

I have a friend who shot his foot off to get sent home from Vietnam. His deployment into river boats forced him to watch people including children burn alive in the Napalm air strikes his boat called in. He transed to a woman shortly thereafter and I had and have no trouble using female pronouns referring to her.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

You’re proud of preventing him from healing completely? This is insane.

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Libertarian's avatar

That was occurring in late 1960’s. Like 67/69. He must have been one of the very few transitioning back in the late 60’s early 70’s. Anyway, I’m a military vet and so are 4 of my brothers; I thank her for her service and hope she finds peace.

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JR's avatar

This is a remarkably calm and reasoned presentation of your position on what we all know is an emotionally charged issue. I commend you for sharing, appreciate the candor, and, as always, marvel at your skill. There just ain't enough of what you do going around right now.

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Deborah R Castleman's avatar

Thanks for this thoughtful piece. One compromise might be to just avoid the use of such pronouns altogether when talking with your daughter.

I felt some hope when I read this: “People of her generation are, on their own, starting to realize the dangers of these medicines.”

Rather than addressing the issue of transgenderism per se, perhaps just discuss (should it come up) the unknown dangers of relying on a lifetime of hormone therapies.

As for other parents, just taking your child out of such environments is perhaps the best call. Who paid for your child’s college?

I don’t know. Just spit-balling here. Thank you, Sasha, for openly discussing the dilemma this poses for many people.

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

As a medical provider, this is what i do. I absolutely will not use someone’s “preferred” pronouns. I will either use the correct pronouns, or call them by name if that will likely be offensive to them. However i have had to correct several patient charts because the wrong BIOLOGICAL sex was listed, just because they preferred it. This is medically dangerous garbage.

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KurtOverley's avatar

The Woke busy aborting their babies and chemically castrating their kids will win Darwin Awards - problem solved as long as you protect your own kids from their insane indoctrination camps.

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Ruth H's avatar

What many fail to point out is that these ‘mass shooters’ are on SSRIs and other drug treatment plans. They suffer from mental illness and are convinced that ‘gender affirmation’ is the answer. How about these medical professionals affirm their real issues and quit pretending gender is their problem.

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ML's avatar

I don’t think that the right going after Budweiser and Mulvaney is a reaction against transgender in it self. I’m sure they are some that don’t like transgender but I’m sure some they would respect the decision of the individual. The reason I think they are against that it’s the fact that they are pushing the Transgenderism down our throats when this group represents a very tiny representation of our society. Like Glen beck said it these companies are doing this to get their edge score higher. If we don’t push back they will just do it even more. At what point we say enough is enough. I’m a white woman who also was for gay rights and them being able to get married. I don’t mind transgender but don’t try to steal woman’s right that we’ve work so hard for to get where we are. I have a 5 year old and now I’m confronted to find a school that I hope won’t teach pronouns. I already need to have conversations with my son about gender and shows he watch on Netflix! It’s insanity out there.

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Les Vitailles's avatar

In short, refer to an individual with male genitals and Y chromosome as a "she" to avoid being tuned out by Biology Deniers.

Next on the chopping block: two wrongs don't make a right?

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JJoshua's avatar

Liberals are polluting the minds of our kids from a very early age the likes of which I have never seen. Disgusting.

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Esther's avatar

Thanks Sasha!

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Brian Keevan's avatar

THIS!!! This is all I really care about with regards to political opinions, info, & news.

You laid out a very clear, concise, & absolutely honest explanation regarding your views on a topic that (I’m guessing) you received some feedback for.

I enjoy your content more than any other program, podcast, etc. & I wasn’t sure why until reading this.

...because you’re honest, & true to “thine ownself.”

Much love & respect from Alabama!

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Sherri Sager's avatar

Thanks for sharing Sasha! I personally think if everyone worked as hard to not be offended, as they do to be offended we would all be better off. I choose not to participate in the nonsense but I try to treat everyone with love. That’s about all I can do. If someone chooses not to accept that, that’s their choice.

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SpandX's avatar

Disclaimer warning: those considering gender transition could develop a male habit of thinking about sex often, everyday, meanwhile also harboring a female perspective that being preoccupied with sex is not normal which may therefore prevent you from ever having what you new male persona wants more than anything you previously thought possible.

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Libertarian's avatar

So basically biology men who identify as females risk becoming a lesbian......brilliant.

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SpandX's avatar

To take this grotesque pissing match further would be for the former men to enact deeper, more ritualistic behavior by undergoing surgical procedures. Thereby winning the competition for the most committed to the cause, the most sacrificial, the most......female? WTF is going on?!

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ali's avatar

I think you hit the nail on the head with, they want to be anything but the “oppressor”.

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Duly Noted's avatar

In 2015 I didn't even know a pronoun was. It was one of many things I forgot or didn't learn in elementary school (I wasn't a good student as a boy).

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Libertarian's avatar

A pronoun is just a noun that gets paid. Not an amateurnoun.

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Duly Noted's avatar

Ha ha.

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Apr 16, 2023
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Libertarian's avatar

“... minimal state intervention in the free market and the private lives of citizens.” And for me I would add - fed up with the GOP RINOs and the Democrat Party that form the Uniparty and via their NEOCONS foster endless wars and ever greater control over our speech, what we put in our bodies (eg deadly vaccinations), our income (eg welfare, taxes, gov funded salaries, etc), and what we can see (eg FBI control over Twitter).

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YourAverageIdiot's avatar

I wouldn't think the preferred pronoun thing was a big deal IF it didn't have the insane baggage of treating a biological male as a legal female (sports / bathrooms / etc.). It's one thing to be supportive of one's feminine/masculine presentation. But the ideological baggage that's baked into today's expectations around pronouns is why I reject the "preferred usage" idiom.

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embarrassingly parallel's avatar

There’s no “slippery slope” here. If someone politely expresses a wish to be he or she, then it’s polite to use it. Though not the end of the world if you fail. They need to get over “deadname” hysteria, and we need to get over pronoun obstinacy. Then we should start looking at real issues like competitive sport together.

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Matt L.'s avatar

I disagree.

It’s placing a ‘cost’ on me to now use a different pronoun than my cognitive senses detect or previously detected. Controlling my speech in this way (no matter how politely one asks) is the opposite of live and let live.

Allowing biological men to compete in women’s sports. That is also something not to be talked about, or if you do, you are to be ignored or called transphobic or another -ism. Because you are speaking against dogma now if you do.

This again is controlling of speech.

This is a free speech issue, loud a clear to me. We can surely work to maintain our relationships w/ our sons and daughters amidst this speech assault. But make no mistake that polite and sugary words to use this speech or not talk about that subject are about control of speech, and by extension, what is and what is not True/Truth.

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embarrassingly parallel's avatar

I agree about the trans sports issues, women’s shelters, jails etc and think a large majority do.

And I understand the cognitive challenge of handling communication when people want to relabel their gender. (They/thems being the hardest to me).

I just suggest that us humans manage difficult relationships all the time. I challenge idea of making “gender truth” our dogma because it gets in the way of what I think are bigger, more practical issues.

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judith's avatar

Most do agree about things like bathrooms and prisons but lately when does “majority rules” matter?

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embarrassingly parallel's avatar

For 8 years+I agree, majority rules haven't mattered Judy. A "moral minority" of MSM and government insiders took charge, and managed to play to the tune of the young and restless. It was a successful coup.

But... I see signs of sense returning. For example Reddit has been a stronghold of young progressive thinking ever since they evicted "TheDonald". Yet recently, last 12 months, I've starting seeing front page posts, complaining about things like the rise of inner-city crime or challenging the substance of Biden's immigration policy.

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Matt L.'s avatar

I agree on that, this pronoun business is a symptom of much greater challenges.

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Libertarian's avatar

It’s like the French; they have to have a word for everything!

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Tyler McKinnon's avatar

Absolutely false. And it’s painfully obvious. Your attitude has already a) began destroying women’s sports, and b) given pharmaceutical companies and quack surgeons a blank check to manipulate, abuse and profit off of innocent children. These are only the two most obvious costs in the, what three years or so your attitude has become the new thing. The truth matters. You can’t just deny truth because “it’s polite”. How vapid can you be??

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embarrassingly parallel's avatar

Discussion by FINA and the UK resulted in announcement of mixed-gender swim categories in which Trans females can participate while also announcing that they cannot participate in elite women's competition. That's thoughtful compromise from thirteen days ago.

https://www.bbc.com/sport/swimming/65166667

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Lynn Barton's avatar

I will use their requested name, but I will not use pronouns because I will not participate in their delusion. We are male or female in every cell of our body. It is biological. A sensitive boy is still a boy. A rowdy girl is still a girl. This is another avenue of cultural marxism that divides everything into oppressor vs oppressed. If you are a white person, if you go trans, then you move from the oppressor category to oppressed, and you are given accolades. I won't affirm a lie, although I will treat every human being as important and valuable because they are made in God's image..

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DavidH's avatar

No, when people call Lia (William) Thomas "he", it is not what they believe, but it is what is empirically true, irrespective of any woke belief system that is clearly not anchored in reality.

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An independent observer's avatar

With all due respect, I do not see why Trump’s name had to be mentioned in this article on a subject that has nothing to do with him. Half of the country already perceives him like a child’s night terror. No reason to contribute to that syndrome. Otherwise, excellent writing, as always.

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