Jessica Simpson is all over the covers of magazines, along with Jennifer Aniston and Jon and Kate.¬† Break-ups sell, don’t they? The girl gone wrong is probably the thing that keeps magazines in business.¬† Why is that I wonder?¬† I know I’m a breakup girl myself.¬† I’m the girl who meets the guy and dumps him, or is dumped by him, before he eventually goes on to find the love of his life.¬† Case in point – going to meet up with Emma’s dad in two weeks.¬† Emma’s dad, for the first time since we’ve been going to visit, has a girlfriend.¬† They’re taking things to the next level.¬† Moving in.¬† She’s 35 so I’m thinking it won’t be long before their relationship moves forward and marriage and then kids.¬† I was always hoping he’d end up loveless and alone forever.¬† Isn’t that horrible of me?¬† Is it any wonder I’m going to burn in hell?¬† Well, I’d have to believe in hell to burn in it – but maybe I’m in hell now.¬† I might be.¬†¬† It sure feels like it sometimes. And other times, not so much.
So I’ll probably meet the girlfriend, and Emma will meet the girlfriend, and we’ll all have to get along for the sake of harmony and a daughter getting to know her very very very VERY distant father.¬† But I’m feeling a bit like the breakup girl right now.¬† I’m feeling all of that anxiety and torture the breakup girl feels until she feels better later, which she always does.¬† Maybe there’ll be a new man, maybe not but that gnawing goes away.
I had no prospects of ever getting back together with Emma’s dad (okay so maybe a teentsy part) but what happens when you have someone’s kid is that, in a way, you kind of deal with them every day.¬† They never fully leave your thoughts because you’re looking at 50% of their jeans every day.¬† The pieces of her that are him remind me of him and thus, I must marinate in thoughts of a failed relationship on a continual basis.¬† So I have to endure these next few weeks and hope that everything turns out okay.¬† Anxiety, she’s always crouching somewhere nearby, ain’t she?
By the way, about that girlfriend…she seems absolutely perfect for him.¬† She has a Flickr account that I looked at and I can tell that they are two peas in a pod, made for each other.¬† So how can I be anything but happy for him?¬† And I am happy for him.
